Thursday, July 9, 2009

Darling Daughters

Everybody's somebody's baby...

Being a dancing daughter is what first set Joan's career on the right path...

...But being B.F.'s didn't do much for B.S.'s - how can she have made so many movies one has never even heard of? I'm going to make a wild guess that Coburn was B.F.

I don't believe this one helped anybody's career. Great lashes, though.

Loretta Young. On a farm. With a Swedish accent. Yeah, that's believable. Possibly the prissiest picture ever named after a genre of dirty joke.

At least one of the four looks like she might be Dracula's. The rest just look Inexplicably Solemn, but then it is from a Fannie Hurst story...

Once Drac got the ball rolling, everybody wanted in on the act. Sadly, none were ever such a success that we reached the Dracula's Daughter and Frankenstein's Daughter Meet the Daughter of a Brooklyn Gorilla phase, but I bet people thought about it...

Ah, John "ex-Mr. Shirley Temple" Agar - the mark of quality.

Do you know how hard it is to make a long-sleeved bias-cut buckskin shirtwaist-style minidress? The leopard belt really does set it off, though.

Actually, Mrs. Brown, what you've got is a bad case of wannabebeatles. Take two aspirin and wait for the sixties to pass.

I think this is the one where she swims, but you never can tell with an Esther Williams picture.

And this is definitely the one where she cries, but that's written into Sally's contract, no?

When I was a tiny tot, my parents went to see this. It was a Huge Event movie playing at the downtown movie palace, and it was going to be the event of the season. The morning after, you would have thought that they had been forced to sit through repeated showings of Plan Nine, and forever after it's been a family byword for Terrible Movie.

But could it really have been worse than this? When you don't recognize a single name, when the graphic looks like that, and when the best that the tag line can come up with is "hundreds of extras" - I think this is one daughter to send back to poppa...


  1. Because I'm nearsighted, I originally thought the last one was "Daughter of the Sin God" which would probably have been lots better, especially with Joan Crawford in the lead, or as the Sin God.

  2. I am anxiously waiting for production to begin on Muscato's Daughter.

    I do hope that Koko the Wonder Dog is portrayed by none other than.

  3. I wonder how many people were touched with "That weird feeling" from Dracula's Daughter.
    I want to feel it too, don't you?

  4. Even with Stanwyck, it's got to be an awful movie to be so unknown, but the Marquand novel on which it's based is one of my favorites. it is as of its period as "Manon Lescaut."