Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The Truth and Nothing but the Truth

I believe it's best if we simply have this out, frankly, in the open, so that there can be no more speculation and lies. We're all aware, I think, of the controversy that has swirled around us in recent months and the pressing question that seems to have obsessed so many:

Is Koko the Wonder Dog in fact eligible to be the Café's official spoiled canine?

I write now to denounce the parties, unknown but vicious, who have been circulating the blatant forgery shown above. I will state now and for the record that none of us have ever even been to Kenya (hell, I think I'm the only one of the three of us who's ever even seen Out of Africa). Besides, anyone who knows us knows full well that I stopped pretending to be 29 years ago. And I have never claimed to be a Windsor, never (Hohenzollern-Sigmaringen? Well maybe, but that's a different story).

No, I think we can let this matter rest. To me, the real question is: why won't that dog release his obedience school records? What does he have to hide? It's not like it's any secret that he does not roll over, and neither does he fetch...

(Get your own forgery here)


  1. As a lover of the Cafe & of canines... & in the name of thruth: I loved this post. It made me laugh it made me feel all warm.